day 30: the anatomy of a compliment

October 8, 2008

mission:

  • pay a stranger a sincere compliment

i’ve been meaning to do this one for a while, i’ve done it very casually a few times this month, but decided to write about this particular occurence.  it was nothing crazy at all:

this past friday marked the near-close of a tiring week.  i can’t say i was in the best mood.  i was probably in a non-mood mood.  yeah, one of those.  i had run out of the office to do something or another and on my way back up to my box aka cubicle i found myself in the elevator with another young lady.

she had on an off white sweater and this awesome periwinkle colored scarf.  she looked so comfy.  and the colors went so well…felt light and airy.  so i decided to tell her: “i really like your scarf and how it complements your sweater.”  she beamed, “thank you!” as she tossed a part of her scarf up in the air, “i always get compliments on this!  i got it for like $15 at gap!”

yessssss.  the victory of a random cheap find complimented.  isn’t that the best?  my little dropling of goodness garnered yet more happy energy from miss lady and in turn made me smile aaaaannnd the circle of goodness thus continues.  rock out.

complimenting strangers, friends, acquaintances, and sometimes even people i don’t quite like much – really anyone – is a habit i formed a while back.  it’s kinda like – why not?  i mean, even with people you don’t particularly like or have consistently had awkward social encounters with, a compliment seriously goes a long way.  try it: next time, tell that weirdo or “mean person” you always see around something sincerely nice about themselves.  get out your marshmallows and watch them warm right up.  aaaoow.

the premise is basic: we spend so much time talking ish that it’s become commonplace.  routine.  accepted.  aka whack.  why not instead take some time to be intentionally proactive in our positivity?  instead of looking at another woman and saying, “awww, damnnnnn.  look at her hair!” why don’t we take some more time to say things like, “hey, girl, those are some dope earrings.”  maybe even try on a huge third-grade cheese after said compliment.

there is something very raw, connecting, and jarring about a random but sincere compliment from a stranger.  i think it’s a beautiful way to color the human experience.

why not go out of our way to tell our sisters how beautiful they look without makeup or show them support for standing their ground in a difficult or compromising public situation?  especially with all the nonsensical preexisting totally unnecessary cattiness amongst us.  forreal, us women need to band the eff together.  uplift each other.  we are all individually dope and there is no reason we can’t be collectively dope.   yes, without hating.  without competition.

how about we thank our brothers we see being good fathers and respectful of women?  good men exist.  let’s let them know they are appreciated and loved.  it’s only through community and consistent support that we can sustain ourselves.  and that doesn’t always mean only our everyday homie/proximal community.  i also mean one-world community.  feeeeeel me?

we can easily observe a lot of goodness walking down the street and take 5 seconds to brighten someone’s day.  no note writing needed.  no long conversations.  no planning.

just presence in the moment and an appreciation for the beauty all around us.

Advertisements

18 Responses to “day 30: the anatomy of a compliment”

  1. beanay said

    I really liked this post! =) Awesome stuff!

  2. My partner and I stumbled over here by a ditferent website and thought I may as well check things out.
    I like what I see so i am just followin you. Loook forward
    to going oveer your web page repeatedly.

  3. Beatrice said

    I like what you guys are up too. This sort of clever work and exposure!
    Keep up the superb works guys I’ve incorporated you guys to our blogroll.

  4. Maybe Smartphones are the gateway to more critical matters that would
    not have existed otherwise. These Grand Masters will deal with the matter personally and then judge the matter accordingly.

  5. each time i used to read smaller articles that also clear their motive, and that is also happening with this piece
    of writing which I am reading here.

  6. Cognitine said

    My relatives all the time say that I am killing my time here at
    net, except I know I am getting know-how every day by reading such fastidious articles or reviews.

  7. Every weekend i used to visit this website, as i want enjoyment, since this this web page conations genuinely nice funny information too.

  8. Hey There. I discovered your blog using msn.
    That is an extremely neatly written article.
    I’ll make sure to bookmark it and return to learn more of your helpful info.

    Thank you for the post. I will ccertainly comeback.

  9. Very interesting info!Perfect just what I was searching for!

    I was reading some of your content on this website and I think this internet site is really instructive!
    Continue posting.

  10. porno said

    I’m gone to convey my little brother, that he should also go to see this
    blog on regular basis to obtain updated from newest news update.

  11. sitzhocker said

    Quality content is the main to be a focus for the people to pay a
    quick visit the site, that’s what this site is providing.

  12. One of the great strengths of Instagram as a social sharing site is that it’s used for shopping.

    As a small extension of that last point,
    when you see pictures you like from a particular instagrammer, all you have to do is touch their
    name above the image and it will link you to their feed.
    There are many communication ways which make life easier.

  13. test said

    I wanted to take the time to express my appreciation towards you which blog that was amazing!
    Loving it!

  14. Hi there, after reading this amazing paragraph i am also
    glad to share my experience here wwith colleagues.

  15. whoah this blog is wonderful i like reading your
    articles. Keep up the great work! You know,
    a lot of people are looking around for this information, you can aid them
    greatly.

  16. This web site really has all the information I needed about this subject and didn’t know who to ask.

  17. I visit day-to-day a few web sites and blogs to read articles, however this weblog offers feature based writing.

  18. m88 said

    I think this is among the most significant information for me.

    And i am glad reading your article. But wanna remark on few general things, The site style is
    ideal, the articles is really great : D. Good job, cheers

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: